If your cat enjoys following you around, doing everything with you, sleeping with you, and feels upset if you leave them alone, it’s likely that your cat has become obsessed with you.
Your cat may be obsessed with you because they’re insecure, lonely, anxious, have separation anxiety, were rescued from challenging circumstances, were coddled as a kitten, are pregnant and looking for support, or are experiencing underlying health issues.
Let’s explore the potential reasons why your cat may be obsessed with you and look at ways for you to get some space away from your cat.
Potential Reasons Why Your Cat Is Obsessed With You
Here are potential reasons why your cat may be obsessed with you and things you can do to create a healthy attachment between you and your cat.
1 – Your Cat Is Insecure
If you are the owner of more than one pet, your cat may be feeling insecure about its place in your life. Cats can be very jealous and territorial, and may feel insecure when you give attention to your other pets.
This might be particularly prevalent if your cat arrived before your other pets. It is likely that your cat feels they have to share your attention and are no longer your main priority, causing them to reach out for more attention to feel loved.
You can try to reassure your cat of their position in your life by spending time with them separately from the other pets. Gradually spend more time with them in a manner that prevents the other pets from getting jealous while also reassuring your cat that you still cherish them and consider them the main priority in your life.
2 – Your Cat Is Anxious
Your cat may be experiencing anxiety for a number of reasons. Firstly, your cat may be feeling anxiety if they had a frightening experience. Perhaps they got lost when they explored outside, or had a scary run-in with a dog in the neighborhood.
If your cat had any anxiety-inducing experiences, it is likely that they feel defenseless and have become obsessed with you because they see you as a place of safety. Additionally, if your cat has had a traumatic past, they may feel anxious about their sense of security, and see you as their provider, therefore attaching themselves to you to feel safe.
In the instance where your cat has experienced hardship, it may take some time for them to become reassured of their safety. Your cat will need to be treated with love and care in a patient, gentle manner, so they feel comfortable in their home, and safe enough to leave your side.
If you and your cat have recently moved homes, it is possible that the change in the environment has caused distress to your cat. If you think that your cat is anxious due to a recent change in its environment, it may be helpful to be patient with your cat. In due time your cat will adjust to its new environment.
If your cat is experiencing anxiety that may require medical attention, it is valuable to take your cat to a trained vet who will be able to advise you on treatment for your cat’s anxiety. Your vet may prescribe anti-anxiety medication or provide tips on how to keep your cat calm.
3 – Your Cat Was Coddled as a Kitten
If your cat was coddled as a kitten, it is possible that your cat displays obsessive tendencies because it was raised to be attached to humans. If your cat spent copious amounts of time with you when they were little, they might have become used to spending time with you.
If you enjoyed carrying them in the hood of your sweater or holding them as you walked around, and let them sleep wherever they wanted to, it is likely that they have developed a sense of attachment to you. In a sense, they see their existence as a part of your existence.
Your cat will need to develop a sense of independence apart from you in order to tone down its obsessive tendencies. Consider getting them toys that they can play with by themselves so that they can become used to entertaining themselves.
Additionally, create certain spots where they are allowed to sit and sleep, offering rewards when they sleep on their own in these areas. Soon your cat will develop a sense of independence and start to associate certain places in your home as their spots to roam and rest.
4 – Your Cat Has Separation Anxiety
If your cat was separated from their mother early in their life, it might have caused them to develop a fear of loss, consequently resulting in separation anxiety. In your cat’s eye’s you are now their guardian, and therefore have an unhealthy attachment to you, based on their fears of abandonment based on the trauma they suffered as a kitten.
Additionally, if your cat was abandoned by their previous family, they may have a sense of neglect and cling to you out of fear that they may be left behind again.
If your cat displays signs of separation anxiety, it will be valuable to look into ways you can reassure your cat that they are safe and secure. Creating a routine for your cat in terms of bedtime and meals can help create healthy habits for your cat, leading to your cat feeling stable and secure in your home.
5 – Your Cat Is Lonely
If your cat rarely gets to interact with anyone else besides you, they may be feeling lonely.
If possible, consider getting a playmate for your cat. Perhaps another cat will provide some company for your current cat, allowing them to be entertained and give you some space.
While cats are generally known to be fiercely territorial, companionship can be very healthy for cats. Getting your cat a mate will give them someone to snuggle up with, play with, and walk around the house with during the day.
You don’t necessarily need to get another cat as a pet. Getting a dog to keep your cat company is perfectly fine.
While your cat might take some time to adjust, they will likely learn to get along with each other soon enough. If they don’t get along, your cat will have someone to constantly terrorize, which will keep them occupied as well.
Alternatively, you can send your cat to a daycare where they will get the opportunity to engage with other pets. Depending on how social your cat is, your cat may enjoy visits to the daycare, which can lead to opportunities for play dates with other cat owners’ pets.
6 – You Have Set a Standard By Allowing Needy Behavior
Your cat may have developed needy tendencies by you reinforcing certain behaviors, such as feeding your cat the moment they demand food, picking them up the moment they meow, or allowing them to sit on the couch and in bed with you.
If you have allowed your cat to get their way often, your cat most likely views their behavior as normal and understands that they need to do certain things to get attention. While this behavior is normal to your cat, it may be interpreted as obsessive to you.
If you would like to adjust your cat’s behavior, you will need to train your cat in certain ways. You can try to adjust their behavior by not feeding them the moment they demand food, picking them up less, or only allowing them to sit in certain spots.
This adjustment is likely to be met with resistance by your cat and may take a while to implement. When implementing these adjustments, it is crucial that you remain consistent in these adjustments so that a new standard is set.
7 – Your Cat Became More Attached Because You Were at Home During the Pandemic
If you were working at home due to the Covid-19 pandemic, it is possible that your cat became used to you being at home, giving them attention, and spending all day with you.
Given that you were home often and perhaps a little lonely because you couldn’t see your loved ones, it’s possible that you might have given your cat extra affection without realizing it. Now that places are reopening, you may not have noticed that you’re spending less time at home, causing you to spend less time with your cat.
While you may not have noticed the decrease in the time spent with your cat, your cat most likely has picked up on this and has become obsessed with you because they want to maximize the time they have with you.
If your cat was a kitten at the beginning of the pandemic, it is likely that they’ve been spoiled in the sense that they were able to spend hours with you every day. Being with you all day, all over the house, has become a norm for them.
They grew up with you around the house 24/7, followed you everywhere, and kept you company. Therefore, their daily habits may appear obsessive for you as you adjust to life after the pandemic where you are spending more time in the office or out with friends, causing your cat to miss you when you’re out, and be more attached to you when you’re at home.
If you would like to encourage your cat to spend less time in your space, consider applying the “remove and reward” approach. The remove and reward approach states that you should pick up your cat each time they are in a place where you don’t want them, and then place them in a preferred space.
Once you have removed them and put them in a new space, you give them a reward. Soon your cat will realize that their good behavior results in a reward, causing them to act accordingly.
8 – Your Cat Is Pregnant
If your cat is expecting, she might be spending more time with you because she feels safe and supported by you. She may want to stay close to you because she feels that you will look after her in her time of need, and if anything goes wrong, you will know what to do.
If your cat is expecting and has started to invest more time in you, it is important that you offer her support during her pregnancy. She is most likely feeling quite vulnerable and needs a healthy support structure.
If you fail to provide a safe and secure space for her, she may feel unsafe and unsupported, which may lead to her running away or hiding her kittens when she gives birth.
Consult a vet on how to provide the best care possible for your cat, and begin to prepare for when she gives birth. Once she gives birth, she is likely to be more focused on her maternal duties and will probably spend less time with you then.
9 – Your Cat Is Experiencing Underlying Health Issues
Your cat may be trying to communicate with you through their obsessive behavior.
If your cat is acting in a different manner to how it did in the past, and seem extra attached to you, it is possible that they are trying to communicate to you that something is wrong and hope that you will pick it up during your time together.
If you suspect your cat has underlying health issues, it would be wise to consult a vet who will examine your cat to determine if there is a medical reason for your cat’s obsessive behavior.
If your cat appears to be obsessed with you, it is likely stemming from a place of uncertainty and fear. Cats often form unhealthy attachment styles if they feel insecure or unsafe, leading them to spend excessive amounts of time with you because they see you as a sign of safety and security.
Creating a routine for your cat can help them feel secure in your home. Additionally, trying to find a balance between when you give them time and attention, in contrast to your alone time, will create healthy boundaries.
However, these boundaries will need to be introduced gradually else your cat may feel neglected and only try to spend even more time with you.
I have a bachelor’s degree in Film/Video/Media Studies, as well as an associates degree in Communications. I began producing videos and musical recordings nearly 15 years ago. I am a guitarist and bassist in Southwest MI and have been in a few different bands since 2009, and in 2012 I began building custom guitars and basses in my home workshop as well. When I’m home, I love spending time with my three pets (a dog, cat, and snake) and gardening in my backyard. I also like photographing wild birds, especially birds of prey.